And I can't handle it.
Everyone brings their own personality and understanding to every song they hear, every book they read, every thing... we bring ourselves to it.
And when Heidi Karlsson listens to that song... I'm sad.
When I was younger I heard stuff like that I WENT EXTREME and I quit basketball. I quit caring about the world. I quit caring about my interests. I quit. And I tried to think about God only. I set a timer on my watch every 3 minutes to chime to check and see if I was still thinking about God. I fasted. I prayed. I sang. I stayed up late to pray, I woke up early to pray, I set my alarm for 3 am to pray because that was painful and apparently sacrifice got attention.. whatever. I was all in for NOTHING ELSE.
It's crazy-making.
So this morning I stopped the song. The "NOTHING ELSE" song. And we talked about it.
"Kids. I want you to love your cat and your dog. I want you to have interests. Play lego. Draw. Paint. Dance. Do gymnastics. I don't understand why or how anyone would want to say "I want you God and nothing else" unless they are saying "If we are talking about choosing gods, YOU are the God I'm choosing."
Hearing songs like that makes me feel pressure to just pray, read my Bible and talk about God - which is what I understood IN THE PAST to be the foundation of spirituality in my life.
Now I think I can't separate spirituality from any parts of my existence. My pursuit of God is in my breathing, loving, walking the dog, writing on FB, reading Mo Willems to the kids at night, drinking coffee... fighting. failing. Mistake making. GOD is HERE in everything. And I am looking for him.
The heart of my frustration comes from the burden that these kind of statements put on people. Especially young impressionable people. Or people new to Christian faith.
I remember a famous preacher talking about the day God captured his heart at youth. He came home, took all his basketball posters down, and put verses up on his wall.
It made me sad. I feel like this kind of reaction has taken influence away from Christian people. We become great at reading our Bibles and praying and talking about God, but when we follow the "ALL I WANT IS ONE THING" thinking, we are not doctors, lawyers, teachers, professional athletes, authors, psychiatrists, pianists... because we just wanted ONE THING and the way we thought we had to pursue it was by... quitting everything and committing our lives to certain "spiritual" practices.
So, from the brain of someone who takes things to the extreme, we won't be singing "one thing" songs over here. "
I'm not chasing "ONE THING" ... because .. . "ONE THING" is chasing me. He's inescapable. Whether you're putting on lipstick or getting a tattoo or changing a baby's bum.
It's NOT more spiritual to have orphanages and start churches in Uganda than it is to be a fashion designer in Paris.
I think SPIRITUAL and WORSHIP is being who we are with reckless abandon - because we are created in the IMAGE of God.
I think we need to take care of our beliefs. Our minds, our hearts. We do what we do OUT of connection, not to create it. God has already reached out.
Now this post is getting long and I'm getting scared. It feels vulnerable. Someone might get offended. But I've seen you guys taking risks in the comments. This is risky for me.
We are not performances FOR God. We inside of MOMENTS with Him. Basketball. Bible reading.
Happy Sunday. I pray we ALL get overwhelmed by the LOVE of God today. Where we are... in the everyday sacredness of existence.
I shall go now to do dishes and find there, the Spirit of God present and excited about me.
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